Welcome To My Life
The universe works in mysterious ways.
My hope for this page is to create a safe space and welcome the outcasts. I believe Medium is a platform to support each other’s growth and communities. I’m going to continue to post my poetry, and also share how the universe works in mysterious ways.
I moved in with my parents last year as a direct result of my mental health. I’m a survivor of Schizoaffective-Depressive Disorder and a recovering drug addict. I celebrated 10 years clean this past August and an active member of Narcotics Anonymous. I’m blessed with insurance that covers 5 medications nightly for the Schizoaffective-Depressive Disorder that started at age 15. Self-care is my top priority. Sleep and a whole food plant-based diet is nonnegotiable. Jeopardizing sleep for all-nighters a few nights a week and eating animal products affect my mood, productivity, and acne breakouts.
I came out as transgender female to male without body modifications or Hormone Replacement Therapy 3 years ago.
I have a wild identical twin, Alex, who responds well when I call her “Barbie” for the right occasion. For example, she lived in Prague last year and I referred to her as “Prague Barbie”. Our family and friends say we have matching faces and mannerisms, but I disagree. We believe in our Opposite Arms Theory. Inside of the womb, we were split at the arms. She will always be on my left. I have an older sister, Julia, who is kind hearted.
I live with Complex Trauma from my childhood, and Situational Trauma from 12 years ago when my boyfriend at the time raped me without a condom.
As an outcome of the Schizoaffective-Depressive Disorder, I have Visual-Verbal Communication Disorder, mixed with a mathematics disability and social anxiety. I was raised with the privilege of private tutors, 504’s, and IEP’s. During my Master of Public Health program, I had a serious case of Imposter Syndrome that left me with a six-figure debt and no degree. I inherently believe I was capable of graduating. I applied to the MPH program with the trust that community health would be the main focus; meanwhile, the program primarily consisted of statistics and epidemiology. The doctor who tested me for updated disability accommodations recommended that I attend graduate school only to support my Bachelor of Arts in Anthropology degree. Without shame or an Inner Critic dialogue, I agreed.
From 2012–2019, I lived in the Bay Area. During those years, I cohabitated with an ex-girlfriend of 6 years, evacuated during the Santa Rosa fires, attended multiple BLM protests, accepted Somatic Therapy, completed transfer classes where the Black Panther Party of Self-Defense was founded, cycled through 4 NA sponsors, worked at Target, and a local grocery store in Berkeley.
Here’s to many more stories with you.